There Should Be No Regrets (No Matter How Bad It Messed Up Your Mental Health)


When I was younger, I used to say that I regretted marrying Michael. He was the love of my life, and I gave him the whole of me. We started our love story when we were only seventeen, and now that I am forty, we have parted ways. It’s not easy to forget twenty-two years of OUR LIFE. The years flew by so fast, but the days were long, most painful and excruciating. In the end, my mental health was affected, and I said I have regrets, but it shouldn’t be the case no matter how badly he has messed me up. Let me tell you why I changed my mind. I don’t regret those twenty years, and I don’t regret meeting him, loving him, marrying him, and now, leaving him.

I Don’t Regret Meeting Him

I met Michael at the university where we both took our Management course. I was in the Honors’ Program while he was in the general classes. We bumped in the hall one day, and we were inseparable ever since. If not for that bump, we wouldn’t have met each other. If we haven’t satisfied, we wouldn’t have loved each other. If we haven’t loved each other, we wouldn’t have decided to get married. If we haven’t married, there would be no children. I love my children because they are a part of me. And so, why would I ever regret meeting him, when he is the father of my beautiful angels? So yes, no regrets.


I Don’t Regret Loving Him

With all my heart, I have loved Michael so profoundly that I never even left a single ounce for myself. I have loved him too much, and I gave everything to him. Yes, that was a mistake, but I don’t anymore regret making that mistake. The reason why I have no regrets of loving him entirely and utterly to the point of craziness is that he taught me something so valuable that cannot be paid by millions of dollars. I learned that I have a heart that could love without conditions. Some people can’t do that, but I can. At least, I am a real human being who is capable of loving. So yes, no regrets.

I Don’t Regret Marrying Him

I hear a lot of women saying – “I do regret marrying him. I shouldn’t have married that stupid man. I cursed the day we got married.” Are you for real? Your husband may have damaged your heart and mental state in more ways than one, but never regret marrying him. I used to regret marrying Michael. Why? Well, he broke my heart because I loved him deeply, and I married him for that love. But what he did, breaking my heart, my mind, and my soul, it made me the strong person that I am today. Nothing and no one can break me now because I have learned from the best teacher, and that is him. And so, yes, no regrets.


I Don’t Regret Leaving Him

And now this, YES, I DON’T REGRET LEAVING HIM. He has money. He has every material thing that his heart desires and more. He has a very prominent name and a family-owned business that will make him rich until his dying days. If I leave him, I will not get that much; not what I deserve. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t want it. And I don’t regret leaving all of it. I don’t regret turning away from him. I don’t regret everything. I used to, at first, but now I DON’T.

My view now in life is different. Everything happens for an essential reason; that’s why in life, there should be no regrets. If you believe in destiny, as I do, you will realize that everything has already “happened.” And so, with me, if Michael made his decision to leave me for a younger woman, and I made the earlier decision to marry him, it is destiny. Yes, we choose, and from our choices and decisions, our fate will unfold. Remember that you always have to decide on what you want to do, and so, choose not to regret anything when it comes to love. If you come out and survive this heartache, like me, you can survive anything. So, yes, no regrets.

Here are some of the statements from therapists about breaking up and moving on:

  • “Most people get the best lessons in life after going through difficult experiences, and breaking up with a soulmate is no exception.” – Connie Omari, LPC
  • “If your partner no longer feels comfortable making long-term plans or talking at all about your future, particularly if they used to be OK with these kinds of things, that’s likely not a great sign.” – Dr. Kristie Overstreet PhD, LPCC, LMHC, LPC, CST, CAP
  • “Dealing with distress is difficult. By its very nature, distress is “great pain, acute suffering and extreme misfortune.” – Casey Radle, LPC