One of the things that you must consider at this point is to become the best version of yourself. As much as possible, make a kind promise to yourself that you will keep on getting better every day. Remember that the more you do things in making it happen, the faster you can achieve the said goal. Take note that when you are at your best, people will start to love you even more. Aside from this, they will also start to see you differently. They will consider you as an inspiration to live their lives for the better.
Aside from this, being the best you can also be good for yourself. It means that there will be fewer chances of experiencing depression or stress. When you love yourself, you start to increase the level of your mental wellness. The more you keep on doing this, the more your mental health will improve. In this article, allow us to provide you a quick guide on how you can become the best version of yourself:
Stop Looking Back
You have to remind yourself that what matters at this point is the present. As such, it is imperative on your part to stop looking back at the past. Stop punishing yourself for all the errors and mistakes that you made. Instead, focus more on improving your life because you deserve nothing but the best. Focus on the present because it can determine your future. If you keep on allowing the past to take control of your life, then there is a high guarantee that you will get stuck.
“Self-worth is what enables us to believe that we are capable of doing our best with our talents, of contributing well in society, and that we deserve to lead a fulfilling life.” – Trudi Griffin, LPC
Be With The Right People
Are you aware that you can never reach your full potential as long as you do not surround yourself with the best people? If you want to get better, make sure that you stay with the right persons. Learn how to detect the type of people whom you must let got at the moment. Remember that there is no clear point in holding on to relationships that are not worth it. If you think that someone is not providing you peace of mind, the right thing to do is to walk away from that individual. Keep your distant and focus more on being close to those who have a good influence over you.
“It can be essential to foster one specific type of self-awareness.” – Ron Siegel, PsyD
Avoid Stressing Yourself
Another thing that you should never forget is the significance of finding ways to keep yourself away from stress. It will be a lot harder or more challenging for you to be happier and better if you always feel anxious or stressed about something. Because of this, it is ideal if you will take a break from your business or work every now and then. As much as possible, find a way to determine the stressors in your life and promise yourself to eliminate them every single opportunity that you can get. If you think that there is something weird or wrong with you, do not hesitate to talk to a therapist. Do not be afraid to consider seeking professional help, especially if it is necessary.
“One thing that powerfully impacts self-esteem is to move something off the back-burner. Whether that’s finally clearing those clothes for donation out of your closet or emptying your work inbox, having one less thing on that to-do list can send your self-esteem to new heights.” – Mike Ensley, LPCC
If there is one thing that you need to remember, it is always to prioritize your health no matter what happens. Make it your personal goal to get fit so that you can enjoy the different benefits and advantages of becoming healthy. Keep in mind that the more you get fit, the better it is for your physical health and mental wellness. As such, you must always make time for physical activities or exercises. Aside from this, you must also start to consider having a balanced diet every single day.
If you want to learn more about some of the effective tips and tricks on how to get fit, we highly recommend that you read the rest of this article.
Find A Fitness Buddy
The first step that we want you to consider is to search for the right fitness buddy for you. Take note that the journey to getting fit is not an easy path to follow. You need someone to remind you of the various reasons why you must continue to put a lot of efforts into losing weight. Because of this, it is best if you will find a fitness buddy who can make things easier on your part. This person is going to be your partner in going to the gym, eating right, and studying about health articles.
Sign Up For A Gym Membership
If you want to get started on your fitness journey, be sure to sign up a membership at the local gym. Whether you like it or not, it is difficult to exercise when you are at the comforts of your own home. You may find it challenging to complete one set of physical activities when you are staying at the house. On the other hand, if you are in the gym, there is a high likelihood that you will focus more on the exercises given by the instructor. At the same time, you will also get a fitness guide on what to do. The guide will depend on your build and body mass index.
Cook Your Meals
One of the things that you must also consider at this point is to prepare your meals. Aside from allowing you to save money, it can also enable you to maintain your figure. Remember that the food items served in most restaurants use several forms of seasoning that can be fattening or even unhealthy for you. As such, it is best to find time to plan your meals for the given week. Learn how to select healthier food choices. Remember that the sacrifices you make today can have a significant impact on your life.
What are you waiting for? Make sure that you focus on improving your life for the better. You need to stop making excuses for not being the best version of yourself. As much as possible, follow the tips that we mentioned above. If you do, everything will be a lot easier on your part. Have fun and enjoy the journey.
Check out these statements from therapists and counselors:
“Exercise releases endorphins, the body’s “feel-good hormones,” that can calm the mind and relax the body.” – Jenny C. Yip, PsyD
“For people with depression, getting exercise helps to alleviate symptoms by giving you feel good endorphins and getting your mind on something else.” – Diane Cerven, LPCC
“We are creatures of habit; and good habits, such as getting regular exercise, make us feel better. Maintaining good habits also helps us feel that we have some control over our lives. Just do it.” – Rosemary Madruga, LPCC
There are many things that you need to remember when it comes to fixing an issue with a friend. First of all, you have to understand the reality that misunderstandings with a friend can be stressful on your part. The longer you ignore and keep it unfixed, the more dangerous it becomes on your part. There is a high chance that you will have low mental wellness. Second, it can also be difficult for you to get on with your life, especially if your friend-turned-enemy is at your workplace or in the same circle.
In this article, we are going to provide you with some tips and tricks on how you can handle your issues and problems with a friend. Before anything else, you need to determine whether the friendship is worth saving for. We recommend that you only read the rest of this article if you believe that your friend needs to stay in your life. Otherwise, you may consider what happened between the two of you as good riddance.
According to Karen Devlin, LPC, “Friendship may have some form of commitment. Often, your friend can be your roommate, and there are many goals you may want to accomplish with your friend. With that said, commitment doesn’t necessarily need to be there for a great friendship. Some friends live entirely different lives but still talk to each other and catch up.”
Below are the things that you must-do if you want to remain friends with her:
Think About The Root Cause
What was the main reason why you got into a fight with a friend? Did she do something that made you hate her? Is her sin something that you can never forget? Or is the issue only a small problem that can be fixed instantly? Going back to the root cause of your issue can be the key to your reconciliation. Think about the reason for the misunderstanding and determine whether it is a good cause to end the friendship. If not, then proceed to the next paragraph.
Find A Way To Talk
Are you aware that most problems continue to exist because the parties to the fight refuse to communicate with each other? The best thing that you must do is to do whatever it takes to find a way to talk to your friend. While you may fight at the moment, it does not mean that you can continue to ignore each other. As already mentioned above, the longer you fight, the more damaging it becomes for the friendship. As such, try to convince your friend to meet you and discuss all the issues maturely.
Emily Griffiths, LPC says “When possible, communicate your plan to your partner, roommate, friend, or family member, as they might be a good support.”
One of the things that you must always keep in mind is to be forgiving no matter what happens. Learn how to accept your friend’s sorry. Even if she did not ask for it, it is also best if you will just forget what happened and provide her the forgiveness she deserves. Remember that life is full of problems, which is why you must make an effort to eliminate each problem one by one. Keep in mind that the more forgiving you become, the happier you will be. If this continues to happen, there is a good chance that you will become the best version of yourself. In the long run, you will also end up happier than ever.
Did You Know?: “Friendships are somewhat easy during childhood and adolescents, as you are surrounded by people your age for 8+ hours a day, during school mostly; there is bound to be simple commonalities found between yourself and others.” – Destiny “Desi” Teague, MS, LPC
When faced with adversity or internal struggles, people fall into self-destruction because they see it as a coping mechanism. It provides them temporary relief but can have lasting adverse effects on their physical, mental, and emotional health. In unfortunate situations, they may even lead to death if not addressed sooner. Therapists have not yet delivered concrete evidence that a mentally and emotionally healthy person is guaranteed to be free of such self-sabotaging behavior.
Hidden in our everyday routine, we must examine ourselves and others for any bad habits before the situation becomes irreversible.
According to Brooke Wachtler, PsyD, “There are four patterns of thinking that spark inner distress: rigid demands, catastrophizing, frustration intolerance, and something she calls “self-downing.”
Manifestations of Self-Destructive Habits
As the name suggests, these are unhealthy behavior designed to harm oneself intentionally or subconsciously. Harmful coping mechanisms may make people feel better, allow them to be numb, or mask their feelings. Other people give in to such behaviors because they want to feel in control over some aspect of their lives. For example, a person who has no control over their spouse’s actions can choose to drink alcohol as an act of defiance.
Self-destructive behavior physically manifests itself in a person’s actions. Some of these behaviors are heavy alcohol or drug abuse, binge-eating, intentional starving, excessive gambling, and cigarette smoking. Among emotionally disturbed patients, self-harm or cutting oneself is also a sign. In this day and age, little do we know that addictive computer gaming is also a self-sabotaging habit among the youth.
On the other hand, some telltales are harder to find because they exist in the recesses of a person’s subconscious mind. Not only can a self-destructive person harm themselves, but they can also hamper social relationships. These habits are harder to identify at first, but after some time, they start to manifest in physical attributes. These bad behaviors are self-pity, self-sabotage, and social isolation.
Ashley Thorn, LMFT, said “Self-care is doing healthy things, in any aspect of your life, that ‘fill your cup.’”
A person wallowing in self-pity tells themselves they are unworthy. They use this to shy away from responsibility and personal growth. Meanwhile, people who are prone to self-sabotage are eternal pessimists. This type sets themselves up for failure before even trying, for they find the opportunity to have no purpose. Lastly, self-destructive people may have the habit of isolating themselves from family and friends. They think they are undeserving of such relationships and consider themselves a burden.
How To Get Rid Of Self-Destructive Habits
Many self-destructive behaviors began as a short-term activity for pleasure. To some extent, people who practice self-destructive behaviors are aware of their abusive tendencies. However, they refuse to stop or change their predicament. Before situations escalate, the best way to get rid of self-destructive habits is through early identification, intervention, and treatment.
Getting rid of these tendencies does not happen overnight. The process takes time and commitment to developing healthier habits. We will be sharing some tips from actual people who suffered from their abuse.
Take responsibility for your actions. Self-destructive people must be able to accept they have harmful tendencies and acknowledge the need to change. Most of them are in denial, and acceptance is, by far, the most challenging thing to do.
Identify triggers. Trace back to the root of the problem. Only you can accurately identify stressors and trigger points. From here, you can decide which triggers to avoid and which habits are healthier to practice instead. For example, your demanding job triggers unhealthy stress-eating. Instead of binging on junk, you can channel your energy toward something healthier like exercise.
Make mindful decisions. Sometimes, however, we cannot evade the trigger point; instead, we can practice mindfulness in controlling how we react to these situations. You must develop the mindset that you can stress-eat, but you choose not to fall back into the unhealthy habit. This action takes a lot of self-control and practice.
Do not give in to negative self-talk. When you are in a self-destructive rut, it comes with a lack of self-confidence but coupled with self-hatred. Therefore, people need to have faith in themselves again. A simple step towards building self-confidence is to forgive yourself and zone out of those toxic thoughts. Start looking for more positive mantras.
Ask for help. Recovering from a destructive path is challenging when done alone. With the support of friends and family, you will receive guidance and positive affirmation on your journey. If you feel like you would need reinforcements, finding a therapist will also empower you to choose a healthier lifestyle. One of the best ways to gain professional help is through online therapy apps like BetterHelp. To know more about the benefits of online counseling, you can visit this review from Indeed.
Little by little, we can counter self-destructive habits no matter how big or small they may seem. We need to examine our activities and thoughts where self-destructive habits may lie. With acceptance, mindfulness, and commitment, we can build ourselves healthier and better lives.
Since people are concerned about their ‘image,’ there are a lot of methods and procedures to help with weight loss. For those who are not battling depression, it is a difficult task to manage your weight or lose extra pounds. But for some who also have a mental illness on top of obesity, this kind of journey is twice more difficult than usual. Balancing your emotions and managing your weight is hard enough as it can make you stressed and exhausted, according to psychologists.
When these mental health issues and weight problems start to take a toll on you, it’s best to seek counseling from apps like BetterHelp. Talking to a professional can give immense benefits in clearing your mind.
When you talk about getting old in front of millennials – the individuals who are currently between the ages of 22 and 37 – you tend to get varied reactions. Some folks may cringe about the idea of having their smooth skin replaced by wrinkles and fine lines. Others’ minds go a little dark and say that they prefer to die early instead of dealing with old people’s issues, including illnesses or retirement. Nevertheless, what’s apparent is that the millennials generally have anxiety over getting old because they don’t know what their life’s going be once they reach their 60s or 70s.
In truth, despite the number of independent adults out there, there is almost the same number of individuals who still partially depend on their family. Many have regular work, but their earnings are usually not enough to fund everything they want to do in life. While some act as if they live a high life when you look at their photos on social media, the reality is that they have a hard time making ends meet or holding on to a job. With all these problems that they already face, it is not surprising for them to be worried about old age.
Still, we believe that getting old is an achievement – something that not everyone can experience no matter how much they have wanted to. It should not give you anxiety, especially if you prepare for it way before you become a senior citizen. Below are some things that our fellow millennials should do now to be able to age gracefully.
1. Invest More
The first issue that young adults have is their lack of intention to invest in businesses or properties. They tend to save money so that they can travel in any country that catches their attention and take a lot of selfies there. Others dream of having a car because they find it too inconvenient to ride the train or bus to work. In short, a good number of millennials capitalize on stuff whose values depreciate or that may not have a value at all.
When you buy your first house before even reaching the age of 25, for instance, the market price will appreciate over time. Regardless of how big or small the lot is, you will be able to sell it at a higher rate a few years later. If you open a business around the same time and advertise it well, you can stop being an employee and become the boss of your own. Once you hit your 60s, therefore, you won’t have to worry about your retirement or your kids’ future.
“You don’t need to be a math whiz or expert in personal finance to improve your financial situation”, according to Brad Klontz, PsyD.
2. Splurge Less
Like we’ve mentioned above, some millennials feel the need to splurge and blow all their money on clothes, fine-dining restaurants, and other luxurious things after getting their paycheck. A close friend of ours, to be specific, has admitted to spending half of her salary on shopping and justifies this habit by saying that she deserves it after working too hard. However, in the end, she barely has enough money to pay for rent or buy real food.
If you want to become old worry-free, you ought to stop splurging every time there’s money in your hands. You deserve to treat yourself – that’s true. You did not steal that cash – that’s also true. But who else has a high chance of being homeless if you spend on clothes or shoes that will get worn out after a few uses and not save up except for yourself?
One reason that we tend to hear from millennials who typically max out their savings account or credit cards when asked as to why they keep on traveling or buying whatever they want is that “there’s no better time to accomplish all of that than now.”
That is something that we beg to disagree on, however. You do not have to wait until after retiring from work before having an opportunity to do the things that make you happy. It is unnecessary for you to have millions of dollars in your bank account to become entitled to go to places. At the same time, however, how difficult can it be to wait for a little – until you have more financial independence than now, to be precise – before you act on your initial plans of touring the world or purchasing anything your eyes can reach?
What we are trying to help you avoid by following the tips above is experiencing regret once you get old. “Why did I not buy a house when the prices were affordable, and I still had a job?” “Instead of buying clothes that I’m already too old to wear, I should have spent on a better healthcare plan.”
Regret is worse than anxiety, in the sense that you can overcome your fear of what’s to come, but you can never bring back the time lost or wasted. Let’s start adulting now and become more responsible than ever, fellow millennials. Cheers!
When I was younger, I used to say that I regretted marrying Michael. He was the love of my life, and I gave him the whole of me. We started our love story when we were only seventeen, and now that I am forty, we have parted ways. It’s not easy to forget twenty-two years of OUR LIFE. The years flew by so fast, but the days were long, most painful and excruciating. In the end, my mental health was affected, and I said I have regrets, but it shouldn’t be the case no matter how badly he has messed me up. Let me tell you why I changed my mind. I don’t regret those twenty years, and I don’t regret meeting him, loving him, marrying him, and now, leaving him.
Having stress and anxiety in your life is an indication that you need to start changing your ways. Take these negative emotions as a sign that it is time for you to think of better ways on how to go on with your days. Keep in mind that you are the only person who can change the course of your fate. If you do not want your mental or behavioral health to suffer, then be sure to find ways on how you can de-stress. Take note that living a stress-free life can do wonders in your days.
Here are the ways on how you can de-stress and eventually experience better days in your life:
Do Not Be Afraid To Quit
Is there something that is causing stress in your day-to-day life? Do you want to find a better job? Is your current relationship making you furious all the time? Is it difficult to deal with your workmates or colleagues? The first thing that you must do is to identify the stressors in your life and get rid of them even if it means quitting your job or ending your relationship. Keep in mind that sometimes, the smart thing to do is to know when is the right time to stop. Avoid putting yourself in stressful situations.
According to Amy Lukowski, PsyD, “Accept that there are events you cannot control – when you know there are times when you have given all that you can to a situation, it allows you to expend energy where it can be more effective.”
Take It Slow
Did you know that stress can be a result of rushing to get things done? The reason behind this is because you are somehow pressuring yourself without you knowing it. As such, it is highly advisable for you to master the art of taking it slow. When you want something to happen or achieve a goal, do not forget the significance of working according to your pace. Do not compare yourself to others and do the necessary tasks or activities on your speed. The more you choose to take it slow, the more you become in control of your life. In the long, it can help in eliminating stress.
Go On A Vacation
Another smart way to de-stress is to travel to a new place – somewhere you have never been to before. Do not be afraid to book a flight to a country that you are going to visit for the first time. Take note that you can travel on your own or with a loved one. The choice depends on what you want to accomplish for the entire trip. If you’re going to get to know yourself more, it is best to do solo travels. On the other hand, if you want or wish to spend quality time with your partner, then going on a romantic weekend getaway may be the ideal thing for you.
“A little bit of stress is totally normal—and can actually be a good thing”, says Aarti Gupta, PsyD.
Find Your Passion
The next thing that you have to consider is to search for what sets your soul on fire. Be passionate in everything that you do, so that you will not experience stress and anxiety. Always choose to do what you love because it can set you free. At the same time, it will also give you more reasons to acquire genuine happiness. For example, you can join workshops, which include activities that are new to you. Do not hesitate to try each one of them until you end up with something that you genuinely love.
Think Positive All The Time
Of course, one of the things that you must never forget is the importance of thinking positive at all times. Always make an effort to attract positivity in everything that you do. As much as possible, avoid entertaining negative thoughts, especially when it comes to your circumstances. You have to learn to believe in the power of the law of attraction. Whatever you think the most, you attract the most. Make sure to manifest good things in your life so that you will not feel stressed out.
Always think that you are bigger than the stress and anxiety that you feel. In so doing, you can think of better ways on how to eliminate them in your life. Sometimes, you have to be right in strategizing the steps that you will be taking to ensure that you can have improved mental health.
This can be a challenging task that platforms such as BetterHelp can address. With the guidance of online platforms and trained professionals, you can effectively make your way toward eliminating stress. Do not hesitate to seek professional help in case your stress or anxiety develop into a depression or other severe mental problem.
Have you ever tried going to a party with the dilemma of which bag to use? You can’t fit everything that you might need in a small purse, and bringing a tote or shoulder bag seems a bit off. You can’t leave your lip tint, your powder, a small bottle of perfume or a wallet with a few IDs and some cash, and not to mention your over-the-top phone plus your keys. So you chose to use a bigger bag instead despite the shabby look. You care less if you just broke a fashion protocol as long as it has everything you need and it gives you contentment and ease. The same goes for single mothers, who are confronted with the same issues every single day – if only they could also fit an online therapist inside their bags, they would! And just when you thought things could get more complicated, there are a few tips on a single mother can keep her sanity.
No One To Turn To
Have you tried having a really bad day that you just want to give up and wished you have someone you can pass your role into? It can be very frustrating and sometimes, breaks you down, that you could only hope for the better.
Single mom solutions:
It is beneficial that you keep everything in check. Create a routine if you could and stick with that. Whenever there are changes or unplanned tasks, then it should not overwhelm you too much. It is also better to pause for a while when being confronted with situations that involve your child’s behavior. Venting out anger on them is not a good idea and might come off worst.
Single mothers knew the struggle of having to doubt themselves and their capacity to raise their children, the perfect way possible. The thing is, there is no “perfect parent” or a “perfect mother” or even that “perfect way” you’re looking for. Parenting can be very challenging, and it doesn’t come in with a manual. Yes, there are books or articles that you can find about great parenting and better ways on how to do it, and yet it just wasn’t enough.
Single mom solutions:
“Take the good ones, leave the unnecessary” – always remember to trust your motherly instincts. Sometimes what works for others doesn’t work for you. The key to it is still looking at your child in perspective as to what kind of person you would want them to be. This will be your guide and inspiration to better parenting, and everything will come out naturally.
Making Decisions On Your Own
Unlike the typical family, single mothers see this as an opportunity instead of a disadvantage. There might be instances when decision making can be tough, but at the end of the day, you can only take responsibility of your actions since you don’t have anyone to blame or to argue with.
Single mom solutions:
Always put your child a priority. Think of the pros and cons of that decision and how it will affect them. This is where your communication comes in. You need to involve your child. This not only builds their confidence and trust but helps them be responsible for their actions too.
Missing The Kids When They Are Not Around
While single moms could use a little time to pamper themselves alone, it still hard to battle anxiety and loneliness. Everything is different when your child isn’t around. It’s like a piece of you has been taken out, and it doesn’t feel right.
Single mom solutions:
Maintaining positive thoughts and communication helps a lot. While away, you could use those spare time doing things that you seldom do for yourself, like going to a spa, binge on a movie or probably hang out with your friends. You could also use some of the time to prepare another activity once they’re back and encourage them to share everything that happens when they were with the other parent. This helps you keep them in check too.
Issues with money can be very overwhelming. It will take the life out of someone, and this is not new to single moms. Whether or not there is child support, your financial capacity is always confronted when it comes to providing the needs of your child. Every parent wants what’s best for their children that often, you confused the needs between wants.
Single mom solutions:
Always prioritize the needs. This is when tough decision making comes in. You have to be frugal for those things that deemed unnecessary and invest more in health and safety. In times that you are confronted with difficulties, take a break. Get some quiet time, go out for a walk to think or take a long shower. Always keep in mind that you should be as strong as the head of the family.
This became a dilemma having to choose an option without too much choice. Most often than not, single mothers were not raised by solo parents. Some have an ideal, if not a great family to start with. You might feel responsible and guilty, that you failed to give your child the family they deserve. And then you begin to doubt yourself if you will ever be a great mother as you even failed to do a simple task of keeping your family together.
Single mom solutions:
Keeping it real for idealists is harder than you could’ve ever imagined. Whenever you felt guilty, always look back to the reason why you’ve made a tough choice. Yes, it might have hurt your feelings and ego or your child feelings too, but you have to understand that you did what you have to do to salvage what is left from your little family and start nurturing it from there. There is only one way, and that is to move forward, not go back.
Losing Your Sense Of Self
Being a single mother twenty-four seven could take the best out of you and sometimes, the worst. After all the days’ chores that will sometimes extend at night, you don’t even remember when the last time you did something for yourself was.
Single mom solutions:
While multi-tasking seemed natural, as a single mom, some things go out of hand and beyond schedule. Make it a habit to have at least an hour work out every day or a five hour pamper time every week. This will light up your mood, makes you feel good about yourself and get you ready in another week of hustling your fantastic life with your child.
In the end, what matters most is your child’s upbringing. There are far more than those into being a good mother that you will ever be. How you do it, whether it’s your creativity or your ability to multi-task, were all just a tip of the iceberg. One thing is sure; unconditional love drove you to do things incomparable to anyone else.
If you are suffering from stress and anxiety because of parenting, remember these words from therapists:
“Be active regularly – being active also helps your body more easily fight stress because it is fit.” – Amy Lukowski, PsyD
“This ‘good stress’ called ‘eustress’ can help propel you forward and motivate you to achieve goals.” – Aarti Gupta, PsyD
“”Purging unused items gives a sense of order to your physical environment, which helps you feel calmer about your stressors.” – Lauren Napolitano, PsyD
Most parents find it difficult to balance home and work life, but how efficient they can manage this aspect will make a significant impact on your relationship with your family. Of course, there are advantages and disadvantages for each option. If you’re a full-time or part-time employee, you probably:
Feel happy and satisfied that you’re contributing to society and you are more self-confident.
Are enjoying a moderate to high economic status level and have less financial problems.
Have a social life and can make time for your friends.
However, you might also be feeling:
Guilty that you can’t be with your children or husband more often than you want.
Overwhelmed with too many paperwork.
Too exhausted to have a social life or even share coffee time with friends.
Bitter about your own life and how much tiring it is to do chores at home.
Well, there are no wrong or right options, and these will change at various phases in your family life. If you have a partner, it might not be too hard if one of you manages the house while the other goes out to work, if you are working full time and your partner is doing part-time shifts, or perhaps you and your partner continue to work on both your full-time jobs.
Balancing work and family life is not as easy as it sounds. You want to manage everything, but sometimes you just don’t have the means to be in control of everything. Work and family life balance is indeed what most of us as parents yearn. Several surveys have revealed that a lot of parents want to make changes so work can be easier to handle, even if it means that pay would be lesser. They also know that spending more time with their kids is more vital.
“People focus a lot on time management, but I think in terms of personal energy management. If you have enough energy, you make better use of your time.” – Sandra Lewis, PsyD
It is unfortunate, though, that achieving this balance is quite daunting. In fact, people in the United States work more hours than anyone in Europe or other countries. You may try talking to your boss about your work hours – that’ll surely change something. After all, the smallest change to your work routine can make heaps of happiness for your partner and children.
“When you talk about burnout, you’re talking about three basic things – one of them is, just generally, you’re more exhausted; you’re more lethargic.” – Joseph Rock, PsyD
Here are some simple tips from parents who successfully balanced work and family life.
Look And Feel Relaxed At Home. If you’re not feeling in the mood, you’ll need to shower and change into something comfortable before sitting down with your kids. They’ll feel it if you’re down or stressed or anxious, and you don’t want that to happen with the little time you have around them. Besides, if you complained to your partner the night before and you keep complaining about it the next day, there’ll be negative vibes at home and work. Stay relaxed, spread good vibes among your family members, and have a wonderful quality morning with them.
Eat With Your Family When You Can. Eating together is one of the most effective ways of strengthening bonds. It’s a great time to listen to your partner talk about his day, or your kids tell you about school and homework and whatnot. If you arrive home late and you’ve already eaten, just sit with them anyway. You don’t have to do serious talks. Just a chat about what everybody’s up to would be a nice way to connect and bond with each other.
Try To Maintain Bedtime Routines. Maybe you can brush your kid’s teeth every other day, to bond and also to teach him the proper way of brushing. Bath time would be a wonderful time to do nightly too, watching them bathe while listening to stories about their friends or teachers. Finally, if you have time, try your best to lie down beside them, open a book, or make up a short bedtime story before they go to sleep. There’s just something in a bedtime story that kids feel how much their parents love them.
Do A Daily Thing Together. This can be as simple as picking up a sibling from school, walking the dog around the neighborhood, or watering the backyard garden. Right after work, let the younger one tag along when you pick up, the older sibling, and then when you’re home, you can go ahead and take them to the park with your pets. You can even sit for a while and maybe make some office-related calls and your children can take a five-minute slide or swing. It may take 15 or 30 minutes or less, but what matters is quality, not quantity.
Do At Least One Big Vacation A Year. You’ll have to give this to yourself, if not for them. All the stress from work and the busy life of everybody can take a toll on your relationship. Everyone needs a break once a year to unwind and feel alive and stress-free. Christmas would be perfect. Visit the grandparents or go on an interstate trip. Encourage your children to try something new, like skiing or hunting, or even cutting wood for the fireplace. Get a nice cabin where you can safely leave your kids to enjoy their vacation, and you can do quality time with your partner as well. You’ll inevitably end the trip feeling refreshed and energized.
It is important to remember always to enjoy your time with your family. It may not always be a breeze, because they’re not in the mood all the time, and you can’t do as you please because of work. However, you are the parent, and you don’t have an excuse not to try doing what’s best for them. Establishing a healthy, loving family life is one of the essential roles of a parent.